I know I’ve been MIA a lot lately. It makes me pretty sad but between working full time now, taking 2 summer classes, & getting to the gym everyday, it’s become kind of overwhelming. I think I’ve already mentioned this.
But I know I usually post about food, fitness, family, etc., but I wanted to focus on something different.
First, I will be honest and say I don’t reveal everything on the blog. Who does? Okay, maybe some bloggers do but I don’t. I think this is because people that read my blog are people that I know personally (most of them). Sometimes I’m afraid to say something that might somehow offend someone. So in the following post about bitching & moaning, I’m going to leave names out of it! .. For the record, I don’t like reading blogs that are depressing and miserable and I’m sure none of you would either. But blogs that I do love are honest ones.
So for the next few minutes I’m gonna
bitch be honest about a few things that I found to be making me a little on the sad side of life lately.
Relationships. Yay or nay?
I’ve honestly never been that type of girl who needed a boyfriend, or even wanted one for that matter. But right now I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want one. I’ve had one serious boyfriend my entire life (I don’t count those silly 8th grade relationships!). It clearly didn’t work out, which is fine. But sometimes I can’t help but feel like I wish I had a boyfriend at certain times. When it came to move on, I had my fair share of flirting with other guys to make time pass. One thing that I did notice that worked for me was not seeing him. It’s been about 10 months since I’ve seen him and the relief is amazing.
But how do you transition into a new relationship? Since I’ve only had one boyfriend, I still haven’t experienced this yet. I mean I’ve gone on plenty of dates and even came close to a new boyfriend, it just didn’t happen. I guess I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it.
Yup, I like to bitch and complain about people too. But then again, who doesn’t?. It usually takes a lot for me to get angry but there’s a few things that just get under my skin.
First, attention whores. Ever get aggravated with that skinny bitch who is always like, “omg, I’m soooo fat” ? Just so someone can respond with,”you’re not fat at all, you look great!”. And it’s always the same people over and over that say and do things like this in order to get attention from people.
Second, comparison people. There are a few people in my life that I feel like are always comparing themselves to me. Mostly in negative ways. This always always always leads back to a weight issue. I usually get that my boobs are bigger than all of my friends, so that’s why I can’t fit into their shirts. I’m not sure why I feel this way, but I do. It’s almost as if this person(s) do this in order to try to make themselves feel better about their own insecurities.
I know I’m not fat, I’m actually pretty healthy. Yeah maybe I could lose about 10 lbs if I wanted to really lean out, but I haven’t found that discipline to maintain a strict diet. This leads back to the comparison people. But I can’t help but to feel that when others compare themselves to me, I feel negative towards myself. Just to give you an idea, if I want to borrow a shirt from someone they might say, “oh I don’t think this will fit you, but you can try”. What? No, I didn’t like that shirt anyways. 😉
Ever notice that you can be entirely happy with yourself, until you start comparing yourself to other people? It’s just a natural thing to do I guess.
But all of this bitching & complaing leads me to one thing. Appreciation.
None of this means absolutely anything to me once I began to appreciate what it is that I do have.
I haven’t mentioned before, but the summer job that I have is working with patients with disabilities. All kinds of disabilities, but mostly mentally challenged, down syndrome, etc.
Until you’ve worked in a job setting such as this, you might not entirely appreciate what you have. Most of the clients I care for are either in a wheelchair or bed all day. They all wear diapers for the most part. Some can eat on their own, but not without a bib and guidance from a staff member. It’s like working with children, except they’re in the form of an elderly adult. The clients have a say in a few things like, do you want to wear this shirt today, “yes or no”. But they have no say in when they get fed, who gives them a bath or changes their diaper, if they stay at home or get to go out to a program, etc.
After working with these clients, I realized I have so much to be thankful for and appreciate.
So the things that I appreciate:
Health. Whenever I don’t feel like going to the gym, I think about my clients. I’m sure they would choose to go to the gym if they didn’t have to stay in a wheel chair.
Freedom. I make all of my decisions for myself. What I’m going to eat, what I’m going to wear that day, doing whatever I want, whenever I want to do it.
Driving. Most of these clients (actually, I’m pretty sure all of them) have never driven a car before. Can you imagine? Our lives are so busy today that it would be almost impossible to get around anywhere without a car!
Relationships. Yeah I might be single, but I’m sure I’ll find someone someday. These clients have never experienced the intimacy of another person. To me, that’s just miserable and upsetting. Everyone should experience love, even if only once.
Family. Sometimes family can drive you crazy, but they love you. Unfortunetly, a lot of the clients families have nothing to do with them. The staff that work their become their family.
You have so much to appreciate, so I hope you take the time and think about all that you have. Don’t let negative, unappreciative people bring you down. You truly are lucky and blessed to be able to do the things you do everyday. Just think about it.
What do you appreciate?